The Inexorable Mouths of Snails

WTF livejournal?

2009-11-17T16:29:15Z

The past several days, since that maintenance, EVERY PAGE takes 5-10 minutes to load, or they load not at all. *shakes fist.* I have a paid account. The monkeys are lying.

Methinks the cookie server is busted. GAH.

meh.

2009-11-06T21:49:32Z

The more I'm on the internet the lower my opinion of the human race in general gets.

Hmm....

Ahh, coffee, my crutch.

2009-10-28T21:52:59Z

I cannot seem to get my day together without coffee. For some reason, the past several days have included this scenario: I get up, get dressed, deal with the boys, and ... forget to make my coffee. Until about 3 pm when I start to wonder why I feel so crappy, forgetful, scattered and just can't get it together.

I need my coffee to remember to do stuff on my to do list. And I keep forgetting to make it or drink it.

I think I need a sign somewhere that says "Make some coffee!" Like in the bathroom.

Sigh. Well, I have it NOW.

Our neighbors moved.

2009-10-17T00:04:36Z

We liked our neighbors.

They are the parents of FX's best friend. He's sad she's gone.

We have lived next to them for 2 and a half years.

They got transferred to another base. On the other side of the country.

The fact that it's inevitable doesn't make it any easier.

I miss them.

Apparently I got scammed

2009-09-21T08:01:38Z

I was one of the folks who was waiting on a bag from Monkey Toes designs on etsy when she died.

Apparently (why am I always late to the gossip table?), last January, she was outed as still being alive.

I had even emailed with her about how I was having to save up to get the bag, and we were in a bit of a financial rough spot (this was 2 years ago).

I feel really, really super used and dirty. And betrayed. On so many levels.

I don't know what to think.

At least it was only about 30 bucks.

A realization

2009-09-17T06:15:43Z

Counting days apart in hundreds.

It is hard.

That is all.

I can't look away

2009-08-02T20:07:52Z

Even knowing where my husband is, I cannot look away from the news coverage of casualties and horror. As much as it scares me to do so, I feel like I have no choice but to bear witness to the reports as they come in. To share the burden of the reality of it as much as I can, as if it will reduce the weight of that news for someone else.

My fears are not the only fears. My hopes are not the only hopes.

I wish it didn't have to be like this for anyone.

Merlin?

2009-07-30T22:35:14Z

Anyone else watching this? I find it kind of charmingly cheesy and only slightly irritating.

I'm not sure what this spam was selling...

2009-07-11T02:57:07Z

"How To Increase Smeen Production? 44 Crucial Steps New Power Plants To Run Onn hCicken Droppings"

All one spam...

desktop background meme

2009-06-10T18:58:23Z

A meme from maricelt (by way of frualeydis:
1. Anyone who looks at this entry please post this meme and their current wallpaper at their LiveJournal.
2. Explain in five sentences why you're using that wallpaper.
3. Don't change your wallpaper before doing this! The point is to see what you had on.

Mine is this:
http://www.antipixel.com/blog/archives/2006/08/15/yakushima_forest.html

It's beautiful, and green and alive. I don't really have five sentences.

Fond thoughts

2009-06-03T18:07:30Z

I miss him. After all this time, five years of marriage, seven years together, two children, all manner of ups and downs, I am still deeply, deeply in love with my man.

I wish there was some way I could tell him today and have it get there in less than three weeks. Well, I can do that much, so into a letter it goes.

Happy Mother's Day

2009-05-10T22:22:25Z

From the one voted Most Likely to Eat Her Own Young.

OMG Phonecall Squee!

2009-04-22T18:30:49Z

I got a phonecall from him today. We got to talk fro almost 15 minutes.

We talked about his care packages and the kids and how I can't sleep in our bed without piling blankets and pillows on his side of it and other mundane things. For a second it was like an ordinary day and we were just bsing and it was so nice.

And now it's been a few minutes since I hung up and ...

I miss him SO MUCH.

Discrimination is always based on thoughtless generalizations

2009-04-18T22:11:11Z

Can we be done with this kind of crap now? Everywhere there are people going on about "THEY are ruining things!!! THEY scare me. THEY are weird!" With "THEY" being whatever group the speakers are fearful of: gays, guys on motorcycles, people with different skin colors or religions or languages, people who eat lots of garlic, people who live in another town, women, men, children, people with strange fashion sense, police, whatever.

I have this to say about that: People are people and some of them suck or have irritating personal habits or cultural differences that seem weird, but FFS, don't equate individual people with everyone of a given group. That's stupid, childish and reveals a lack of abstract thought or the willingness to put effort toward using abstract thought.

It's the personal-interaction equivalent of not understanding why there's nobody behind the mirror making faces back at you. Make the effort. Let go of the blame, drop the scandalized attitude. You are not cavemen. Evolve a little.

The donut doesn't hate me as much

2009-04-13T20:45:43Z

...but it still hates me.

It's a big chunk, that "done" part, but not big enough.

Frak you, Donut of Misery.

I hate the Donut of Misery

2009-03-30T20:15:18Z

... and it hates me.

That is all.

We failed at Earth Hour

2009-03-29T04:07:14Z

The kids Would Have None Of That. Sigh.

Oh well, I tried, and they followed me around turning everything on again.

Things that make you go hmmm.

2009-03-26T20:04:37Z

Our president has fangirls. O_<

I have no idea how I feel about that.

Communication

2009-03-16T15:51:10Z

I got a phonecall today.

Wow.

I'm floored and happy and I think I can ride on this high for a week.

But I still cried after he hung up.

Goodbye, Papa J

2009-02-22T18:25:16Z

Last night, the man who wasn't my grandfather died. We were not related much at all, but he, his wife, and my mother had been great friends for a long time, and they regarded her as a supplementary daughter.

We were the only grandchildren they had, me and my siblings, and then I had kids and they had some great grandkids. And we sent pictures and talked on the phone with them.

It's been a long time coming, this. He's been too sick to visit for years, adn sick for much, much longer than that. They kept fending off his cancer until he wore out.

My kids never met him, but they got to hear his wonderful voice.

I wish my husband had gotten to meet him. I miss his stories. I will always miss his stories. Wonderful stories.

Goodbye, papa J. My tears are all for selfish reasons because I really feel the world is less without you in it. And that's not fair.

A good thing

2009-02-12T00:27:01Z

James called me Mommy today. He said it TWICE. The last time he called me mommy was a few months ago.

It's worth noting, anwyay, so I can come back and see it.

jauncourt @ 2009-01-27T19:59:00

2009-01-28T04:01:03Z

I find myself unwilling to trade months of heartache for less laundry, fewer dirty dishes and no soda cans in my recycling bin. Not that I get a choice.

Look! I'm making something.

2009-01-27T19:49:47Z

From dolls09

More pics below, in ze flash thingy:

What the CPSIA Means to Me

2009-01-25T04:58:14Z

This is mostly copied from my Other Blog. This missive is not "against" the CPSIA, however, I am worried about how that very necessary piece of legislation has been, and continues to be, mishandled by the vary people who should be making it work. As it stands, it's not doing any good, and won't be able to do any good, until the blame stops being passed back and forth between the CPSC and the Committee for Energy and Commerce.

Like many, many other parents, I was delighted that there were now steps being taken to test imported, lead-contaminated toys. I still am. I am delighted that the toys and clothes and feeding items available to me will be safer in the future. However, there is something gravely wrong with this necessary, well-intentioned law.

What is wrong? The CPSIA is both too narrow and too broadly defined,, requiring items known to not contain lead to be tested, specifically disqualifying component testing or testing by materials suppliers, and thus effectively making it impossible for small and micro businesses to comply at all. Some will survive by making only two or three items in batches of sufficient size to send one for testing, but their prices will go up. Some small companies are being turned away by the certified testing labs, because their business isn't lucrative enough. It's even worse if you make one of a kind, unique items - things that might be possible to make from a selection of pre-tested and certified materials must now be made in batches of two, so that one can be destroyed by the testing lab in digestive lead testing.

This would not be a problem if the parts of the law that need defining, clarification, redefining, etc could be dealt with, but the CPSC and the House Committee on Energy and Commerce are dragging their feet, and passing the buck back and forth. Nothign is getting done, even though there seems to be a lot of talking and blamethrowing. That means that all these thousands of small companies, small stores, even libraries and schools, that want to comply with testing, or that already do by only using/buying domestically made materials, are left out in the cold, unable to do comply, because no questions are going to really be answered in time for the deadline(s).

I call it irresponsible, especially given the desperate economic climate our country is in. The fact is that the testing is often unnecessary, and where it might be necessary, it is mandated to be done in the most onerous, burdensome way. Furthermore, the lack of sufficient labs coupled with the short time frame for testing has made it impossible to even get the requisite tests performed, were the tests even easily affordable. Costs have been driven up to amazing levels by the sudden overwhelming demand.

What does this mean to me? I was working on a home business, getting all may ducks in a row, getting ready to sell a few items for kids on etsy. That's not going to happen now.

As I've said elsewhere, my embryonic business is being forced to change focus completely. At least I only had a few items made up to try out sales for the holidays when the impossibility of continuing due to the CPSIA caused me to stop and put everything aside until I could work out what I was going to do.

I even set aside all the standard startup paperwork (thank goodness I put a hold on my plans before I filed for my fictitious business name! I'd have to refile, because it was obviously child oriented!) as soon as the impact of this law became apparent, while I was researching use testing requirements last fall. I had hoped to have everything in place to start small in early December, but my etsy shop instead sat empty, and will remain so until I finish my non-kids designs, and figure out exactly what I'll be doing.

I've looked back at the time I've spent preparing and it turns out it is over 2 years of work down the drain. I am looking to refocus entirely on hand spun yarn, historical costumes, and collector art dolls (NOT for kids, small parts, display only). Time will tell if there is even anyone who wants those things. I'm sad. My kids loved the prototypes of my playthings, wore my cloth diapers and cloth training pants, I wanted to share what I'd made for them with other kids.

As bad as I feel about not being able to share my kid-oriented work with others, I feel worse that I won't be able to buy handcrafted items for my own children, or I'll have very few, and MUCH more expensive, options available to buy. According to this law, I can't even swap my craft work for someone else's craft work, unless both items have been third-party tested according to the law's requirements. Even if all parts are domestically sourced and confirmed lead free and nontoxic by the materials manufacturers, that person-to-person craft swap is illegal, an exchange of contraband for contraband.

I may - may - be able to get samples of the fabrics and notions I use XRF tested so I could list and sell the few items I have ready between now and August, when even that screening process will become insufficient. However, that depends on demand, and I have to work out if the profit I will make on a few all-textile toys, cloth diapers and dressup hats will cover the fees for that, even given how reasonably priced as a small-volume XRF scan consultation can be.

That's where I am. It's not a pleasant place to be. It's like looking at the burnt-out shell of a home you once loved. What's worse is that I'm not alone. It's like a huge city has been obliterated, and we all have to start over.

This has been long-winded, but people in despair want to talk about it. It usually helps to do so. So far, my letters, calls and emails have been ignored. So far, it looks bleak.

At least our inspiration can't be outlawed. I can only hope that next year, some of us can emerge from the wreckage, like cicadas, and begin again.

Please go vote to have the CPSIA's unintended effects brought to Obama's attention!

2009-01-13T18:31:01Z

http://www.change.org/ideas?order=top#listSection It's #4. We have only a couple of days left to vote.

Right now, it will still effectively put all handcrafts businesses that make children's items OUT OF BUSINESS, or drastically reduce the number of items available. There is no provision for component testing, so one-of-a-kind items (dolls, bears, clothes, etc) will become a thing of the past, as unit testing (the only option allowed under the law) destroys the item.

There is also no regulation of testing costs (complete, required tests cost between a few hundred and several thousand per item), few labs available to do testing, and enormous penalties (jail time and fines up to 100,000 dollars) for not providing proof of testing.

Please vote this up - right now the "legalize pot" idea is at the top of the finalists list, and that looks kind of bad, don't you think?